Wilson Mizner

The worst tempered people I have ever met were those who knew that they were wrong.

— Wilson Mizner

Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down.

— Wilson Mizner

A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.

— Wilson Mizner

I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.

— Wilson Mizner

Don't talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.

— Wilson Mizner

A fellow who is always declaring that he's no fool, usually has his suspicions.

— Wilson Mizner

The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.

— Wilson Mizner

Always be nice to people on the way up; because you'll meet the same people on the way down.

— Wilson Mizner

I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.

— Wilson Mizner

Life is a tough proposition and the first hundred years are the hardest.

— Wilson Mizner

A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he knows something.

— Wilson Mizner

If you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research.

— Wilson Mizner

Copy from one, it's plagiarism; copy from two, it's research.

— Wilson Mizner

Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him.

— Wilson Mizner

The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.

— Wilson Mizner

I have known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, but never had a thought.

— Wilson Mizner

There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.

— Wilson Mizner

If you steal from one author, its plagiarism. If you steal from two, its research.

— Wilson Mizner