Alan King

Marriage is nature’s way of keeping people from fighting with strangers.

— Alan King

The banks have a new image. Now you have “a friend,” your friendly bank. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?

— Alan King

As life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs. Now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.

— Alan King