Oscar Levant

An epigram is only a wisecrack that's played at Carnegie Hall.

— Oscar Levant

Underneath this flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character.

— Oscar Levant

Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.

— Oscar Levant

Strip away the phony tinsel of Hollywood and you will find the real tinsel underneath.

— Oscar Levant

Once I make up my mind, I'm full of indecision.

— Oscar Levant

Once he makes up his mind, he's full of indecision. [On Dwight D. Eisenhower]

— Oscar Levant

There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.

— Oscar Levant

Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.

— Oscar Levant

What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, there are so few of us left.

— Oscar Levant

There are two sides to every question: my side and the wrong side.

— Oscar Levant

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.

— Oscar Levant

It's not what your are, it's what you don't become that hurts.

— Oscar Levant

I've given up reading books. I find it takes my mind off myself.

— Oscar Levant

I once said cynically of a politician, Hell double-cross that bridge when he comes to it.

— Oscar Levant