Frank Dane

The great American novel has not only already been written, it has already been rejected.

— Frank Dane

Blessed is he who talks in circles, for he shall become a big wheel.

— Frank Dane

Where the criminals cover their crimes by making them legal. [On Washington D. C.]

— Frank Dane

A conservative is a fellow who thinks a rich man should have a square deal.

— Frank Dane

Get the fools on your side and you can be elected to anything.

— Frank Dane

It is not necessary to have enemies if you go out of your way to make friends hate you.

— Frank Dane

Some have greatness thrust upon them, but not lately.

— Frank Dane

Nothing annoys a woman more than to have company drop in unexpectedly and find the house looking as it usually does.

— Frank Dane

Ignorance is never out of style. It was in fashion yesterday, it is the rage today and it will set the pace tomorrow.

— Frank Dane

Remember when $25, 000 was a success? Now it is a garbage collector.

— Frank Dane

In polite society one laughs at all the jokes, including the ones one has heard before.

— Frank Dane

A liberal is man who will give away everything he doesn't own.

— Frank Dane

The way to a woman's heart is through your wallet.

— Frank Dane

A set of rules laid out by professionals to show the way they would like to act if it was profitable.

— Frank Dane

A man who calls bullshit fertilizer.

— Frank Dane

Rome had Senators too, and that is why it declined.

— Frank Dane

The news of any politician's death should be listed under Public Improvements.

— Frank Dane

Preachers denounce sin as if it was available to everyone.

— Frank Dane

Time is money, especially when you are talking to a lawyer or buying a commercial.

— Frank Dane

Life is strange. Every so often a good man wins.

— Frank Dane