Frank McKinney Hubbard (born 1 September 1868 in Bellefontaine, Ohio - died: 26 December 1930 in Indianapolis, Indiana) was an American cartoonist, humorist, and journalist better known by his pen name "Kin" Hubbard.
Ther's allus been leap years, but I doubt if any o' us ever knowed a case where any girl ever actually took advantage o' th' privilege an' asked any feller point blank t' marry her. Ther's allus been a lot o' hintin' an' beatin' around th' bush an' hypnotizin' an' vampin', but I don't believe any girl ever blurted out a straight proposal. But now that we've been emancipated, I look fer a lot o' radical changes.
The evening of October thirty-one is Hallowe'en or Nut Crack Night. It is clearly a relic of pagan times but it is still very popular. It is a night set apart for walking about and playing harmless pranks, such as placing the hotel omnibus on top of the Baptist church or plugging the milkman's pump.
When th' summer landscape takes on a scuffed an' faded appearance like a over exposed ten dollar suit we know we are face t' face with dog days, that midsummer season o' th' year when all livin' things jist sorter peter out an' langour rules supreme in shop an' mart an' field.
What's th' sense o' exhaustin' all th' pleasures o' life durin' th' first few months o' courtship? Why not save a few pleasures t' look forward t' after you've satisfied th' instalment houses? Marriage at best is quite a comedown fer most any girl, 'specially if her engagement period wuz one long an' riotous dream.
Th' great national curse t'day is over-eatin'. We do not only eat too much, but we devote too much time thinkin' about eatin'. . . . Ever'where we look there's a eatin' place. . . . Wherever ther's population enough t' fill a few stools we find a great brazen coffee urn an' a stack of buns.
Women are so used t' takin' things home on approval, an' makin' things over, an' exchangin' things, an' takin' things back, that they use th' same system with husbands. They jest reason that they kin take a man an' if they don't like him they kin dump him. Sometimes they try t' make him over. Men don't hanker fer divorces as much as women do. They hain't home much an' besides they kin get away with a double life better'n a woman.