Quotes about Marriage

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A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.

No man was ever shot by his wife while doing the dishes.
The man who says his wife can't take a joke forgets that she took him.
One of society's biggest problems today is that we've allowed relationships to be accepted as impermanent, particularly marriage.
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.
The difficulty with marriage is that we fall in love with a personality, but must live with a character.
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
They flaunt their conjugal felicity in one's face, as if it were the most fascinating of sins.
Our marriage is like anybody's marriage, It goes through ups and downs. It's a little garden that you have to tend all the time. When we're home, it's not like we walk around all dolled up going, We are celebrities! We are famous! I change diapers. I clean up dog doo.
This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in love as they are in debt.
Marriage is the great antidote to the poison of enthusiasm and passion
A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes.
If a man works like a horse for his money, there are a lot of girls anxious to take him down the bridal path.
To marry a man out of pity is folly; and, if you think you are going to influence the kind of fellow who has never had a chance, poor devil, you are profoundly mistaken. One can only influence the strong characters in life, not the weak; and it is the height of vanity to suppose that you can make an honest man of anyone.
A woman must be a genius to create a good husband.
Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it.
How many young hearts have revealed the fact that what they had been trained to imagine the highest earthly felicity was but the beginning of care, disappointment, and sorrow, and often led to the extremity of mental and physical suffering.
For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven. [Matthew 22:30]
The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.
Marriage. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress and two slaves, making in all, two.
As a general thing, when the woman wears the pants in the family, she has a good right to them.
The mere idea of marriage, as a strong possibility, if not always nowadays a reasonable likelihood, existing to weaken the will by distracting its straight aim in the life of practically every young girl, is the simple secret of their confessed inferiority in men's pursuits and professions to-day.
Marriage, it seems, confines every man to his proper rank.
I hate work. That's why I got married.
The aura of the theocratic death penalty for adultery still clings to America, even outside New England, and multiple divorce, which looks to the European like serial polygamy, is the moral solution to the problem of the itch. Love comes into it too, of course, but in Europe we tend to see marital love as an eternity which encompasses hate and also indifference: when we promise to love we really mean that we promise to honor a contract. Americans, seeming to take marriage with not enough seriousness, are really taking love and sex with too much.
One was never married, and that's his hell; another is, and that's his plague.
I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up.
Though women are angels, yet wedlock's the devil.
The deep, deep peace of the double-bed after the hurly-burly of the chaise-lounge.
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
A man will teach his wife what is needed to arouse his desires. And there is no reason for a woman to know any more than what her husband is prepared to teach her. If she gets married knowing far too much about what she wants and doesn't want then she will be ready to find fault with her husband.
There is a time for all things -- except marriage my dear.
There's nothing like a Catholic wedding to make you wish life had a fast forward button.
Never join with your friend when he abuses his horse or his wife, unless the one is to be sold and the other to be buried.
Except for poverty, incompatibility, opposition of parents, absence of love on one side and of desire to marry on both, nothing stands in the way of our happy union.
Marriage is a matter of give and take, but so far I haven't been able to find anybody who'll take what I have to give.
My wife and I were happy for twenty. Then we met!
I'd marry again if I found a man who had 15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the marriage and guarantee he'd be dead within a year.
So that ends my first experience of matrimony, which I always thought a highly over-rated performance.
Marriage as an institution developed from rape as a practice. Rape, originally defined as abduction, became marriage by capture. Marriage meant the taking was to extend in time, to be not only use of but possession of, or ownership.

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