Quotes by Twain, Mark

"When one has tasted it [Watermelon] he knows what the angels eat."

Twain, Mark on food and eating   

"I was young and foolish then; now I am old and foolisher."

Twain, Mark on fools and foolishness
30 fans of this quote   

"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."

Twain, Mark on fools and foolishness
48 fans of this quote   

"Forget and forgive. This is not difficult when properly understood. It means forget inconvenient duties, then forgive yourself for forgetting. By rigid practice and stern determination, it comes easy."

Twain, Mark on forgiveness
13 fans of this quote   

"Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it."

Twain, Mark on forgiveness
13 fans of this quote   

"Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it"

Twain, Mark on forgiveness
3 fans of this quote   

"Fortune knocks at every man's door once in a life, but in a good many cases the man is in a neighboring saloon and does not hear her."

Twain, Mark on fortune
7 fans of this quote   

"It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either."

Twain, Mark on freedom
9 fans of this quote   

"Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life. The conviction of the rich that the poor are happier is no more foolish than the conviction of the poor that the rich are."

Twain, Mark on friends and friendship
22 fans of this quote   

"Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with."

Twain, Mark on friends and friendship
20 fans of this quote   

"The holy passion of friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money."

Twain, Mark on friends and friendship
6 fans of this quote   

"Where a blood relation sobs, an intimate friend should choke up, a distant acquaintance should sigh, a stranger should merely fumble sympathetically with his handkerchief."

Twain, Mark on funerals
3 fans of this quote   

"I did not attend his funeral; but I wrote a nice letter saying I approved of it. [About a politician who had recently died]"

Twain, Mark on funerals
8 fans of this quote   

"He is useless on top of the ground; he ought to be under it, inspiring the cabbages."

Twain, Mark on futility
5 fans of this quote   

"Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered -- either by themselves or by others."

Twain, Mark on genius
22 fans of this quote   

"I am admonished in many ways that time is pushing me inexorably along. I am approaching the threshold of age; in 1977 I shall be 142. This is no time to be flitting about the earth. I must cease from the activities proper to youth and begin to take on the dignities and gravities and inertia proper to that season of honorable senility which is on its way."

Twain, Mark on age and aging   

"Let us not be too particular; it is better to have old secondhand diamonds than none at all."

Twain, Mark on age and aging
6 fans of this quote   

"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen."

Twain, Mark on age and aging
8 fans of this quote   

"Methuselah lived to be 969 years old . You boys and girls will see more in the next fifty years than Methuselah saw in his whole lifetime."

Twain, Mark on age and aging
12 fans of this quote   

"The older we grow the greater becomes our wonder at how much ignorance one can contain without bursting one's clothes."

Twain, Mark on age and aging
6 fans of this quote   

"When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old."

Twain, Mark on age and aging
9 fans of this quote   

"A man cannot be made comfortable without his own approval."

Twain, Mark on aid and assistance
5 fans of this quote   

"Sometimes too much drink is barely enough."

Twain, Mark on alcohol and alcoholism
6 fans of this quote   

"Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody."

Twain, Mark on alcohol and alcoholism
4 fans of this quote   

"Keep away from small people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great."

Twain, Mark on ambition
24 fans of this quote   

"In Boston they ask, How much does he know? In New York, How much is he worth? In Philadelphia, Who were his parents?"

Twain, Mark on america
4 fans of this quote   

"It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it."

Twain, Mark on america
4 fans of this quote   

"There isn't a single human characteristic that can be safely labeled as American."

Twain, Mark on america   

"Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person."

Twain, Mark on ancestry
5 fans of this quote   

"Golf is a good walk spoiled."

Twain, Mark on golf
8 fans of this quote   

"It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress."

Twain, Mark on government
5 fans of this quote   

"We have the best government that money can buy."

Twain, Mark on government
6 fans of this quote   

"Damn the subjunctive. It brings all our writers to shame."

Twain, Mark on grammar
3 fans of this quote   

"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man."

Twain, Mark on gratitude
21 fans of this quote   

"What is the most rigorous law of our being? Growth. No smallest atom of our moral, mental, or physical structure can stand still a year. It grows -- it must grow; nothing can prevent it."

Twain, Mark on growth
7 fans of this quote   

"A habit cannot be tossed out the window; it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time."

Twain, Mark on habit
7 fans of this quote   

"Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time."

Twain, Mark on habit
5 fans of this quote   

"To stop smoking is the easiest thing I ever did. I ought to know; I've done it a thousand times."

Twain, Mark on habit
12 fans of this quote   

"Happiness ain't a thing in itself --it's only a contrast with something that ain't pleasant. And so, as soon as the novelty is over and the force of the contrast dulled, it ain't happiness any longer, and you have to get something fresh."

Twain, Mark on happiness
9 fans of this quote   

"There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one: keep from telling their happiness to the unhappy."

Twain, Mark on happiness
5 fans of this quote