Quotes by Jonathan Swift

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Jonathan Swift (November 30, 1667 October 19, 1745) was an Anglo-Irish writer who is famous for works like Gulliver's Travels, A Modest Proposal, and A Tale of a Tub. Swift is probably the foremost prose satirist in the English language, although he is also well known for his poetry and essays. He also used the name Isaac Bickerstaff among other pseudonyms. more

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The most positive men are the most credulous.

One of the very best rules of conversation is to never, say anything which any of the company wish had been left unsaid.
Complaint is the largest tribute Heaven receives.
I have been assured by a very knowing American of my acquaintance in London, that a young healthy child, well nursed, is at a year old, a most delicious, nourishing, and wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will equally serve in a fricassee, or a ragout.
Nothing is so hard for those who abound in riches to conceive how others can be in want.
Censure is the tax a man pays to the public for being eminent.
The lack of belief is a defect that ought to be concealed when it cannot be overcome.
Faith! he must make his stories shorter or change his comrades once a quarter.
In church your grandsire cut his throat; to do the job too long he tarried: he should have had my hearty vote to cut his throat before he married.
Ambition often puts Men upon doing the meanest offices; so climbing is performed in the same position with creeping.
Better belly burst than good liquor be lost.
The latter part of a wise person's life is occupied with curing the follies, prejudices and false opinions they contracted earlier.
Whoever wishes to win in this game must have patience and money, since the values are so little constant and the rumors so little founded on truth Vision is the art of seeing things invisible.
How haughtily he cocks his nose, / To tell what every schoolboy knows.
A soldier is a yahoo hired to kill in cold blood as many of his own species, who have never offended him, as possibly he can.
Conversation is but carving! / Give no more to every guest / Than he’s able to digest.
He showed me his bill of fare to tempt me to dine with him; said I, I value not your bill of fare, give me your bill of company.
We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another.
Every man desires to live long, but no man would be old.
I have now lost my barrier between me and death; God grant I may live to be as well prepared for it, as I confidently believe her to have been! If the way to Heaven be through piety, truth, justice and charity, she is there.
O Grub Street! how do I bemoan thee, whose graceless children scorn to own thee! . Yet thou hast greater cause to be ashamed of them, than they of thee.
Style may defined as the proper words in the proper places.
Promises and Pye-Crusts, are made to be broken.
No length of time can make you quit Honour and virtue, sense and wit, Thus you may still be young to me, While I can better hear than see ; Oh, ne'er may fortune show her spite,To make me deaf, and mend my sight.
If a Child be sick, give it whatever it wants to eat or drink, although particularly forbid by the Doctor: For what we long for in Sickness, will do us good; and throw the Physick out of the Window; the Child will love you the better; but bid it not tell. Do the same to your Lady when she longs for anything in Sickness, and engage it will do her good.
Who, by disgraces or ill fortune sunk, Feels not his soul enlivened when he's drunk?

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