Quotes by Jack Benny

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Jack Benny (born Benjamin Kubelsky, February 14, 1894 December 26, 1974), an American comedian, vaudeville performer, and radio, television, and film actor, was arguably the biggest star in classic American radio and was also a ... more

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I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis, and I don't deserve that, either.

I don't want to tell you how much insurance I carry with the Prudential, but all I can say is: when I go, they go too.
It's not so much knowing when to speak, when to pause.
I don’t deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don’t deserve that either.
My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.