Quotes by George Mikes

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George Mikes (1912--1987) was a Hungarian-born British author, most famous for his commentaries on various countries, starting from his first book How to be an alien which poked gentle fun at the English, including a one-line chapter on sex: "Continental people have sex lives; the English have hot-water bottles." Subsequent books dealt with (among others) Japan (The land of the rising yen), Israel (Milk and honey, The prophet motive), the USA (How to scrape skies), and the United Nations (How to unite nations), Australia ("Boomerang"), and the British again (How to be inimitable, How to be decadent), and God (How to be God).

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Continental people have sex lives; the English have hot-water bottles.

The trouble with tea is that originally it was quite a good drink. So a group of the most eminent British scientists put their heads together, and made complicated biological experiments to find a way of spoiling it. To the eternal glory of British science their labor bore fruit.
An Englishman, even if he is alone, forms an orderly queue of one.

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