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  ...manufacturers of alarm clocks.

PHILANTHROPISTS
WEALTHY BENEFACTRESS (stopping in at the hospital)--"Well, we'll bring the car tomorrow, and take some of your patients for a drive. And, by the bye, nurse, you might pick out some with bandages that show--the last party might not have been wounded at all, as far as anybody in the streets could see."--_Punch_.

PHILOSOPHY
Rube Wilkins says--"You can't get ahead while you're kickin' any more than a mule can."
All philosophy lies in two words, sustain and abstain.   " --_Epictetus_.
The philosophy of one century is the common sense of the next.--_Henry Ward Beecher_.
Philosophy, while it soothes the reason, damps the ambition. --_Bulwer-Lytton_.

PHYSICIANS AND SURGEONS
_See_ Doctors.

PITTSBURG
PITTSBURG MAN (telephoning to Long Island from New York)--"Ten cents? Why, in Pittsburg we can telephone to Hades for a nickel."
CENTRAL--"But this is a long-distance call."

PLEASURE
Pleasures are like liqueurs:...   Epictetus

Excerpt from More Toasts · This quote is about abstinence · Search on Google Books to find all references and sources for this quotation.

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