John Doeyeyes - my quote collection

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I never cared for fashion much, amusing little seams and witty little pleats: it was the girls I liked.

Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
There are no good girls gone wrong, just bad girls found out.
Scandal is what one half of the world takes pleasure inventing, and the other half in believing.
I laugh because I must not cry. That is all. That is all.
What soap is for the body, tears are for the soul.
In youth one has tears without grief, in old age grief without tears.
Every woman is wrong until she cries, and then she is right; immediately.
Adam was the luckiest man; he had no mother-in-law.
Man's unique agony as a species consists in his perpetual conflict between the desire to stand out and the need to blend in.
By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man's, I mean.
Familiarity breeds contempt; and children.
It was the schoolboy who said, Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
We owe a deep debt of gratitude to Adam, the first great benefactor of the human race: he brought death into the world.
Why is it that we rejoice at birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.
Humility is like underwear; essential, but indecent if it shows.
Don't be humble, you're not that great.
When we become aware of our humility, we've lost it.
He that humbleth himself wishes to be exalted.
The noblest spirit is most strongly attracted by the love of glory.
Big results require big ambitions.
The slave has but one master, the ambitious man has as many as there are persons whose aid may contribute to the advancement of his fortunes.
Ah, but a man's reach should exceed his grasp, or what's a heaven for?
One's eyes are what one is, one's mouth is what one becomes.
Influence is like a savings account. The less you use it, the more you've got.
Defoe says that there were a hundred thousand country fellows in his time ready to fight to the death against popery, without knowing whether popery was a man or a horse.
All diseases run into one. Old age.
Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings.
Every man is said to have his peculiar ambition.
Whatever you are, be a good one.
A Government of the people, by the people and for the people, shall not perish from the earth.
Military glory --the attractive rainbow that rises in showers of blood.
I don't know who my grandfather was; I am much more concerned to know what his grandson will be.
The best way to destroy your enemy is to make him your friend.
I dream of a place and a time where America will once again be seen as the last best hope of earth.
How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.
You can fool some of the people all the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all the time.
Can anybody remember when the times were not hard, and money not scarce?
When it is dark enough, you can see the stars.
The ship of heaven guides itself and will not accept a wooden rudder.
Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.
Ambition is the germ from which all growth of nobleness proceeds.
A serious problem in America is the gap between academe and the mass media, which is our culture. Professors of humanities, with all their leftist fantasies, have little direct knowledge of American life and no impact whatever on public policy.
What I am looking for is a blessing not in disguise.
If you saw Atlas, the giant who holds the world on his shoulders, if you saw that he stood, blood running down his chest, his knees buckling, his arms trembling but still trying to hold the world aloft with the last of his strength, and the greater the effort the heavier the world bore down upon his shoulders -- what would you tell him to do? I don't know. What could he do? What would you tell him? To shrug.
To accuse others for one's own misfortunes is a sign of want of education. To accuse oneself shows that one's education has begun. To accuse neither oneself nor others shows that one's education is complete.
What is to give light must endure the burning.
The one who prosperity takes too much delight in will be the most shocked by reverses.
As a rule, adversity reveals genius and prosperity hides it.
Adversity makes men, and prosperity makes monsters.
Learn from the mistakes of others, you can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
Every man has a property in his own person. This nobody has a right to, but himself.
To be upset over what you don't have is to waste what you do have.
Capitalism without bankruptcy is like Christianity without hell.
No excellent soul is exempt from a mixture of madness.
The best morale exist when you never hear the word mentioned. When you hear a lot of talk about it, it's usually lousy.
Nature is trying very hard to make us succeed, but nature does not depend on us. We are not the only experiment.
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Most men pray for power, the strength to do things. Few people pray for love, the quality to be someone.
Religion is in the heart, not in the knees.
It is human nature to think wisely and act foolishly.
There are plenty of good five cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter.
We have too many high-sounding words, and too few actions that correspond with them.
We need cancer because, by the very fact of its insurability, it makes all other diseases, however virulent, not cancer.
The ballot is stronger than the bullet.
A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government.
Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of the cancer cell.
Reason itself is fallible, and this fallibility must find a place in our logic.
Only my condemnation injures me.
Seek not to change the world, but choose to change your mind about the world.
Society is like a stew. If you don't stir it up every once in a while then a layer of scum floats to the top.
Belief in the supernatural reflects a failure of the imagination.
Let them hate, so long as they fear.
I am never upset for the reason I think.
Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.
A wise person does at once, what a fool does at last. Both do the same thing; only at different times.
To be able to look back upon one's past life with satisfaction is to live twice.
Opinions alter, manners change, creeds rise and fall, but the moral laws are written on the table of eternity.

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